Settling

Today was one of those days where despite my best efforts of setting up a good fuck, and going to the trouble of also setting up a promising backup, I almost went without ass completely and basically ended up with a consolation prize: a pathetically quick juicing-up of a Not As Cute As Picture latin guy who had porked up a bit but had a party-favor dong, at least 9", that had me drooling. And even that almost didn't happen once I arrived at his Chelsea sty, as I'll explain in a bit, so after a day of frustration I guess I'm lucky I got off at all. But I'm still finding that everyone I get with in 2013 takes my cum! And that's something. I guess. But for the curious, here are the gory details of the day's disappointments.

The primary supposed fuck is a very well-built, good-looking guy who has chased me before, having me call him up on the phone a couple of years ago and talking my ear off, first about how I look just like his high school english teacher and then about all kinds of nonsense in his life, while I sat there patiently with my dick in my hand waiting for him to finally tell me it was time to go over and ejaculate inside him. After a half an hour of yammering he decided it was getting too late and in subsequent days he seemed to lose interest, but kept me on his buddy list or whatever. He's one of those people who suddenly reactivated when I changed my pictures on all the hookup sites. He chased me for days and I was hesitant to encourage him, thinking he was a bit of a wacko, but he was so believable about thinking I'm hot (I'm not) that I let my defenses down, and told him I might be able to swing by after my volunteer stint in midtown. He wouldn't keep things vague when I said I'd text him when I was free, and told me the place he was staying-- a hotel, inexplicable to me as he is local or at least lives in Queens, but who knows, maybe this is a Manhattan sex vacation for him. And he insisted on getting my number too. I decided that all meant he was truly for real, and he periodically sent me messages through the day telling me how he was looking forward to it, and did I like to drink anything special or would I like him to make me a panini or something with this special sandwich maker he has? This was a little too much! I told him no thanks on all that, that I'd just want to get my hands on him as soon as I got there so just wear some nice-fitting clothes and tight colored briefs underneath so I could kiss him and touch him through his clothes and unwrap him slowly before I fuck the hell out of him. And maybe he could make me a sandwich after that. "DONE!" he bellowed.

I began to wonder if he was just on drugs. So as an emergency backup I wrote a cute guy on Scruff who also claims he wants me to shoot some of my giant jets of cum in him, asking if he'd be around tonight. He said he was having dinner with friends but should be done by 9. And he gave me HIS number.

I had two numbers, and an actual address, and a possible free post-fuck panini! I felt golden!

By 4pm or so, Panini Dude was begging me not to hate him because his grandfather suddenly died and could we do it some other time and he'd make it up to me if I let him and he'd bought special underwear and lube and EVERYTHING but he was on his way to JFK and would be gone till next week. This seemed very unlikely (although, my brother-in-law dropped dead several years ago on the day I was supposed to hook up with someone, and I had to make a similar excuse, though I was so distraught I barely said anything except there had been a death and I had to leave town. I certainly didn't beg him "not to hate me" as that would be crazy. And I didn't say I'd make it up to him because my brother-in-law had just died and I really didn't care about some dude on the internet who wanted to fuck.) So I'm calling bullshit on this dude, taking this as evidence that he really is on drugs, and that there was never going to be any fucking, much less a nice crusty panini, and I have half a mind to show up at the hotel anyway and jizz in his face when he opens the door.

So. That left little bare bottom boy. I did my volunteer thing, then texted him. He replied quickly that he was having fun with his friends and wouldn't be able to hook up. There ya go! Honesty! I'd like to think having my bone thrust into you for an hour is preferable to gabbing with a bunch of queens over kale salad on 10th Avenue, but that's just me. At least he had the balls to say something real.

So now I am all loaded up with no one to squirt in. I went to dinner and looked through some sites on my phone. I saw All American Bottom online. We'd exchanged friendly hellos over the weekend when I saw he'd checked out my profile out of the blue-- just seeing him in my track list made my dick hard, and we both agreed we look forward to fucking again-- and he's just blocks from where I volunteer. But I don't want to turn into Tuesday Night's Dick with him. I need to keep things fresh with him. Can't fuck him too often or I'll lose that spark. So I didn't hit him up. But thinking about fucking him made me NEED to get my dick in someone.

I was starving so I ate a mediocre $14 hamburger and began chatting with this guy on BBRTs with a gigantic tool. He says he's a top but he wanted me to "breed" him. He said we'd talked before-- I honestly didn't remember. His body was nice and muscular in his pics, and his ass was very meaty and the dick was fucking insane. His face was not too shabby either. I told him I could swing by in a half hour after my food settled a bit. He said take your time. I did, and I ended up getting to his place pretty late.

Well, his place was a wreck, crap everywhere, terrible lighting, weird, weird bed about 4 feet tall crammed up against a wall. Ugh, the places I go to get my rocks off. I couldn't decide if he was cute or not. I was very tired. It was very late. We kissed some and I felt his ass, which was plump and round but just way too big. I felt his wang and it was soft but defffffinitely seemed promisingly meaty. My own dick, however, was barely a clitoris at this point, thoroughly retracted into my bush after huffing up four flights of stairs on a full stomach to the shock of disappointment. Bravely, I pulled it out and pushed him to his knees and told him to suck it.

He was perhaps understandably not enthusiastic. I'm always a grower, not a shower, almost to the point of embarrassment. And I wasn't growing; he gave barely-there head that was not going to help me get hard, and seemed like he was completely grossed out by having this little worm thrust into his face. So I pulled him up to me, and felt him up a bit-- his dick had swollen a tiny bit but was still totally soft.

I figured I'd cut my losses. "I'm sorry, it's late, I think I'm too tired," I said. "Yes," he said, glancing down, "I think it's not working." I got dressed and we talked a little. He suddenly started looking cuter to me; maybe part of my mind was playing tricks on itself, but I started really thinking maybe I should stay and give it a whirl. I kept thinking about the dick. (I'm a top, but I'm still gay, and I love a big beautiful dick.) We kissed a bit more as I was saying good bye, and he touched my face and said "You are so handsome." I put down my bag, put my hands on his shoulders, and said, "If you're patient, maybe I can make it work." He looked shy and demurred and mumbled he had to call his sister in Denver. I kissed him some more and stuck my hand in his pants and felt his schlong. "Denver is two hours behind," I cooed into his ear. "Yes, there is that," he said, putting his own hands in MY pants. And we both started getting hard, standing in his rat's nest of a kitchen full of photography supplies, feeling each other's dicks and making out. His quickly grew to the promised 9 inches, for real. My own dick, now fully tumescent and as fat and meaty as it ever got, looked like some sort of Fisher Price toy penis next to his. I got on my knees and blew him blissfully. Absolutely gorgeous cock, cut (unlike most Latinos), beautifully proportioned and tubular and straight, gorgeous fleshy dickhead, very good-sized nuts to complement it. He kept pushing it down into my throat, and I can do that ok though I was stuffed with hamburger and told him to keep that at a minimum if he could. He smiled and indulged me. I didn't need this stupid day to end with me blowing chunks all over his wang.

We went to the crazy tall bed and I tried to make him suck me some more but that was clearly not his thing, even with me fully erect and respectably thick. Oh well. I pushed him over on the bed, made him get up there on all fours, and ate his ass a bit-- I think he had douched with something that smelled medicinal. Ay chihuahua. But I held his giant dong while I licked between his ample cheeks and my dick got hard and oozy. There is nothing like holding a humongous tool in your hand while you eat out the ass it is connected to, even if it reeks of eucalyptus.

I figured there was no time like the present; it was time to deliver the gooey shipment. I stood up, pushed him further back on the bed and turned him to face longways, hopped up on top of him, and pushed into him with one stroke. He fucked back into me immediately. This is not usually something I like in a bottom, but tonight I decided just to give up and let him fuck himself with my dick. So I just put my hands on my hips and basically watching him bang me in reverse until my penis was spasming inside him and releasing all that cum.

"Did you cum, did you cum?" he asked, and I told him yes, and he fucked himself for a few more minutes, letting my dick slosh around in its own ejecta. I occasionally thrust into him so he could feel my whole length, such as it was compared to his own. And then I slapped his back, pulled my dick out, and said, "Now you can call your sister in Denver! Can I wash up a bit?" He told me sure, and I soaped up my tool and rinsed and dried it and put it away for the night. We chatted amiably about his photography career while I finished getting dressed. And I was on my way.

Another Chelsea debacle. You guys are supposed to be keeping me from hooking up in Chelsea! You're doing a terrible job.

Anyway, I came in another dude.