web log analysis Confessions of a Promiscuous Top: Too Much and Not Enough

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Too Much and Not Enough

My latest ejaculate just walked out the door deep inside the flawless body of a 23 year old jet-black Dominican kid-- absolutely flawless. Broad shoulders, thick arms and legs, tiny muscular waist, ass like a pair of grammar school globes, fat dick, big balls. This was quite a trophy for a middle-aged schlub like me-- and he had hit ME up on the normally useless app Jack'd, where my picture quite unashamedly shows my hairy but not very toned midsection (maybe that's why it's useless). But the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. As an insatiable lover of intense, transportive sex, I can *only* mark this down into the trophy column, something which definitely strokes my ego, I guess, but which I am not really very interested in. It was very much like spooging in a Sphinx. A red-hot, fucking stacked, sex-on-wheels Sphinx.

The kid had hit me up last night when I was lying in bed trying to get sleepy. He pursued meeting but also had a very pulled-back, abstracted air. I talked a little dirty to him but he didn't respond to it much, and I somehow got the feeling he was maybe a little too intelligent for that. When I asked him if he liked cum, he said "Yeah cum is cool. I'm an innocent little freak lol" and I replied, "And here I am, trying to corrupt you." "It's all good. Sometimes a little corruption can be quite liberating," he said. Hm. I really wasn't sure of what to make of him. I pushed the raw issue and he said it sounded "cool"; everything was "cool" if it wasn't "hot". And he wanted to know what time we could meet up today. I wasn't sure how I felt about the whole thing-- why was this kid after me? Some of his face pictures were also much less flattering than others; his body was clearly blazing hot but in the end I like to fuck a whole person, and he wasn't totally my type in the face. Having had a pretty bad track record with (1) perfectly built men, (2) guys younger than 28, and (3) guys who aren't obvious sex fiends when I give them license to be, I was inclined to blow him off. But I gave him a time with a noncommittal air about it, and he said some specifics about his time limits. He seemed pretty together. So I put him in the possibly maybe bin and went to bed.

And then today was one of those days. I was getting offers right and left from dudes, most of whom said exactly the right things. But I kept going back and looking at the kid-- could I really pass up someone that beautifully built for a very hairy, long-haired, satyr-bearded chunky cocksucker on the Lower East Side, for example? The latter got me very hot with the way he talked about servicing my meat, and I really liked his somewhat animalistic, libidinous face, but I kept going back to the kid's picture. I decided even though it was a couple of hours before I'd said I'd be free, I would hit him up and ask if he wanted to come ball. He replied fairly quickly saying it would be a while, as he was at the gym-- the dude looks like he fucking LIVES in the gym-- and then had to go home, deep in Bushwick, to clean up and so on. I told him to keep me posted, and slowly decided I really wanted to fuck my cum into him more than any of these other guys, who I let down easy one by one. And then had to sit around waiting for the kid to get ready, feeling perfectly confident that I had made the absolute wrong decision.

He told me he was leaving about when I expected, but ended up taking absolutely forever to get here, to the point that I felt punked. One of the bottoms who wanted me to seed him over in Park Slope reappeared, asking if I'd done the deed. I told him no, that I thought I was being flaked on, and asked for some specifics about where he was-- he looked pretty good too, and I could just get in the car and drive over and fuck him and finally get some release. But of course right as I sent that message, I heard from the kid; he was a block away.

And on the intercom camera, when the doorman buzzed me, I saw exactly how fuckin awesome his meaty body was, and got very excited. But when he arrived, he zoomed in the door, barely looked at me, playing with his phone and his earbuds, and instantly asked where the bathroom was. I told him and off he went. Not sure what he did in there, but it took a while; I squared my shoulders and prepared to be rejected when he came out.

Instead, he came out and asked, "Where do you want me?" looking around rather bewildered. I asked again whether he was cool with everything, giving him a clear chance to say no, but he put his stuff on the couch and let me lead him back to the bedroom. He still wouldn't quite look me in the eye as we squared off, and when I leaned in for a kiss, he turned his head down. "You don't kiss?" I said, feeling like an idiot for not asking this before I got myself into this. He shook his head. I stared at him and waited till the silence made him look at me. "You sure everything is cool?" He smiled at me, a little nervously/perplexed, and said, "Yes." OK, well, I already had a bunch of wind knocked out of my sails, but I ran my hands over his body, and instantly decided fuck it, I'll get what I can.

I had him take off everything but his boxer briefs and lay face down on the bed. And I pretty much just worshipped the fuck out of his ass… first through the fabric, then after pulling it off, naked.

His legs were very stiff and he almost seemed to be denying me entry. But look, you're here, you won't kiss me, you know what I want, give it to me. I gently applied pressure to the requisite joints as I ran my face over these spectacular mounds of bottom-flesh, and eventually his thighs were at the right angle to allow me full access to all the best parts of his body. His back was massive, beautifully curved down to the cinched waist, and his ass cheeks rose from that valley like beckoning hills.

He was absolutely silent during all this. I stroked my dick while I licked and ate until it was respectably hard, then brought it around to his face. He looked at it briefly, satisfied with its thickness, and sucked me into him. He sucked rather gently and slowly, but with perfect suction. Eyes closed, massive muscular body supported on his elbows, hands clasped weirdly piously on the bed while he suckled at me. The proportions of his deeply black, taut body on the fluffy white comforter were graphic and stark. I couldn't believe this creature was sucking my fucking dick. I reached down and pulled on his chin and tried to make him kiss me, but he wasn't having it. Fine. All this for me, this amazing body, those limbs, those wet inviting holes, but no kiss. It was like half the sex I wanted to have could not be had with this ideal sexual creature. No matter what happened, it wouldn't be enough. How frustrating.

I let him suckle me more, but I felt like I would cum; he was just too beautiful. I decided to slide down and eat him some more. He positioned himself with his ass hiked up a bit more, and I had access to his fat dick, which the sucking had made hard as a rock. Very nice. Not any longer than mine, but slightly thicker, with an even fatter dickhead than mine. Beautiful. I sucked the head and licked the shaft and ran my tongue over his fuzzy balls and his taut gooch and into his rather tight hole. Over and over. I held his massive flanks in each hand while I ate away. Spectacular.

And then I positioned my dick there, just admiring the thick straight white tube of flesh against his unbelievably inviting mounds of ass, and I tried to drill in with my hips. He was very tight. And then he started, saying, "Can you…. can you get a video of this?" And he reached down beside the bed into a bag, fishing around for his phone.

Ugh. I can't kiss and now I also have to be a camera man when I really just want to ride his body like a spaceship to planet Spooge. But also, ok, I want a fucking record of this: MY DICK WAS HERE. So I took the phone, and the flash light was very bright and it was an awkwardly large phone and when he got back into position my dick had lost a bit of its steely length, and I knew I wouldn't get it into that forbiddingly clamped bunghole. So I set the phone down, and said, "Lemme get back in the groove a bit here, I'm easily distracted," and he made a kind of "whatever" gesture, and folded his hands again, dropped his head, and prepared to be violated again with my tongue and fuckstick.

How frustrating! This could be amazing. What was wrong with this kid? Ah well.

I ate myself hard again, and had him suck me more-- ALL THAT spread out between my legs, unbelievable; I almost popped about nine times in thirty seconds of head-- and then moved into a 69 position, swallowing his unit whole while he lapped away at mine, kneading his round buttocks in my hands while I stuffed my face full of his dick and drilled my own dick into his head. And that almost made me cum, too. My dick was hard enough to cut diamonds.

I knew I couldn't make much out of this. He didn't want to be on his back, didn't seem to want me to even see his face. He rolled back on his stomach and again waited to be dicked down. I certainly had hydraulics on my side by this point. I slicked my blood-engorged prick up with spit and pushed in; his hairy hole scoured the length of my dick and I got jammed halfway in. I pulled out, ate some more, forcing more saliva in with my tongue, and pushed in again, getting stuck halfway again. I told him to sit tight while I got some lube, but he said, "Oh no, I'm ok." "Really??" I asked. "Yeah," he said, and went back into sphinx mode. I love a spit fuck more than anything, and hate lube, and clearly if I was hurting him he didn't care. So I pushed in hard and got it all in there. And pulled all the way out.

The sight of this fuck, with our starkly mismatched colors, was absolutely lurid; you could see everything. I asked for his phone again. He found it somewhere in the bedclothes, and I filmed my dick sinking into him a few times; his ass cheeks were so deep and my length is so modest that it didn't look like a whole hell of a lot. But damn it, that was my dick in that dude. And I liked it.

I set the phone aside and gave him long strokes of penetration, pulling all the way out, trying to get used to the sensation, trying to get to a point where we could seriously fuck. But I couldn't get into the groove. Finally I said, "I just gotta fucking cum," and I pounded his body hard. Fucked my dick straight down into his bottom gland. And he liked it; finally he made some whimpering sounds. I instantly began ejaculating, of course, but fucked my way through the orgasm and kept fucking out the other side; my dick stayed stiff and I liked the feeling of his thick muscles resisting my body on the down stroke every time I slammed into him, so despite all the pleasure largely having left along with my last spurt of semen, I kept body slamming him, and he kept whimpering. Finally I collapsed on top of him, holding his body close to mine, pushing into him as deep as I could, and flexed my dick. One last penile "so THERE". And then I pulled out.

He lay there a bit face down and I stroked his body all over. Then he quickly flipped onto his back, looked down so I couldn't meet his gaze, and asked if I would suck his nipple so he could cum too. Shit, if I'd known he was into his chest I would have been all over it. Maybe this could have gone better. But I learned it too late. I sucked his nip and cradled his balls and then he popped white goo all over his black belly. And then he rocketed up out of the bed and ran to the bathroom.

I got him a towel, told him to feel free to rinse off, and he closed the bathroom door again, barely 20 minutes after the first time, and spent even longer in there. He came out and accepted my offer of some water, but was so skittery it was painful. He folded the towel daintily and put it on the dresser in a neat pile-- most guys drop it on the floor or put it back on the bathroom sink-- and began to dress. I got him his water and tried to make nice small talk, asking where he was going to school and what he was studying. He sat on my couch and wrestled with his shoes like they were some kind of unknown apparatus, with an obscure connection to his feet. I said, "You don't have to hurry, take your time, I'm not kicking you out." And he slowed down, and got them on. But we sat in silence. I had to bodily resist the urge to blurt out, "What the fuck was that, why are you like this, why don't you know how to enjoy your body??" But I didn't. And then right before he left, he opened up, told me he was going to Manhattan for a rehearsal, he was also into acting, blabla. And then he ran out, shy or uptight or unhappy or glad to be rid of me or whatever he was.

So much bounty, and such a desert, at the same time. Tonight, I will dream about softening his carapace, opening him up, sinking into him, filling him with load after load with my tongue down his throat and a head completely devoid of any thought but pleasure and joy at having a male body that is next to another male body. But it will just be a dream.


  1. Oh, but experiences like this will make it feel like climbing everest when you get the whole package (or a closer facsimile of it). Of course, I say that like a mom encouraging her son to eat his brussels sprouts because they're supposedly good for you.

    1. Well, I do have to say, on reflection and with distance from my disappointment, his pliant nature and patience with me eating the holy living hell out of his ass for as long as I did was pretty nice. And I just can't tell you have fantastic this body was-- I'm getting a hard on just thinking about it. I've readjusted my attitude to gratefulness I even got to put my dick in him at all, and I'll keep it there.

      I might msg him and ask for a copy of the video, though!

  2. But just to see how you did directing the camera, right? Purely a learning tool...

    1. Heh well I actually did ask him and he kind of dissed me, saying the video was barely three seconds long and he deleted it. Maybe that's so; I really don't like being distracted during sex. I guess he really just fucks to get videos of himself getting fucked. Not much fun for me… sigh.