web log analysis Confessions of a Promiscuous Top: Open

Friday, June 13, 2014


It's been a while since Ultra Meat has come by. He told me a while back that he had started school and was crazy busy, and even his profile says he doesn't have much time. I have to admit that one of my more perverse personality traits has been awakened by this lack of attention to me: now that he is largely unavailable, I suddenly want him. Despite his amazing body and sweet disposition and genuine if inexplicable love of my dick and my schlubby body, I always pushed him to the back of potential sex partners. But he checked me out on Scruff a few days ago and reactivated his attractiveness. Today I had hoped to hook up with someone visiting from London with an amazing ass who says all the right things, but he wasn't around this afternoon like he said he'd be-- I hadn't much banked on it anyway, since he's visiting and of course would be more about be-bopping around with friends than waiting for me to tell him my genitals were available for his delectation. So after a late lunch and a ridiculously delicious scone at a coffee shop across the neighborhood, when Ultra Meat actually woofed me on Scruff, I impulsively asked, "wanna suck me?" and he said "yes" and I said "meet me at my place in 15 minutes," and I hiked over in the sudden sultry heat to get off. Because it's better to get off than to not get off, right? And there were two unexpected perks this time.

First: he let me cum in his mouth. He didn't swallow me-- I know he's too chicken for that-- but he let me cum and cum and CUM in him (I felt like I had a pint of milk in my nads) and then held it in his mouth, grinning at me, when I had to pull out of him and jerk the oversensitive last few seconds of orgasm out of my body. When I was totally done flopping around like a fish on a bench, he held up a sock that was lying nearby, looked at me quizzically, and I said, "Go for it," and he spat me out all over it. I guess I came even more than usual; the sock was completely slimed and then a big gob ended up on the sheet anyway; it looked like he was spitting out his fucking lung. That was a big load.

(I was surprised this worked out at all. He got here right after I did, and I felt sweaty and unattractive, and a little stressed about work, and though it felt really nice when he started sucking me, I just couldn't get hard. My partner and I are camping out in my office because our bedroom floor is being resurfaced, and Ultra Meat was squatting in the doorway beside the mattress sucking my uncooperative noodle, and everything just felt very inelegant and wrong. And of course he's a regular, and I've trained myself to be sucked off by new men, always new men, so no matter how hot he is, I need more More MORE. I lay back in the bed, and he said "I don't care if it's soft I just want it in my mouth, it tastes so good," and I groped all his bulging limbs and bodily promontories and still my dick would not get hard. I ate his ass and held his dick, which was as hard as the barrel of a pistol and oozing precum, but even this didn't help me get hard. I apologized, saying, "I don't know what's up with my dick today," and he said he wanted to suck it anyway, and so I knelt over him, dangling my sad worm into his mouth, looking at his huge muscular physique spread out on the bed, steadying myself with one hand on his huge pectoral muscle, and damn if he didn't suck me hard. Then I lay my body on his and he wrapped himself around me like a bereft lover and I humped and humped him while he babbled sincerely but utterly falsely about how much he wanted me to fucking breed him. I felt my dick slide through an impressive amount of slime oozed onto his belly by his sex glands; his precum told me how much he missed me. "You always make me hard," I cooed into his ear. "You always make my dick feel good." I guess there are some positives about a regular partner.)

Second: After he came-- laying back on the bed, demanding my gooey dick to suck on, shooting right when I lay my big thigh across his body and humped my body against him, miming a fuck, he suddenly gasped and said "OH YEAH" and spurted all over himself-- he opened a floodgate of honesty. Starting by asking me if my partner new about us specifically (apparently Ultra Meat saw me on the subway one day, and started to say hello, but realized my partner was beside me, and apparently my partner looked at him funny), he suddenly spewed all this information about his own relationship status. Often he is quite cagey when we are done, and acts like he doesn't want to talk at all. So I'm not sure what brought this on. But I honestly liked it. I'm not sure why I'm wired this way, but I do like to get to know who I'm fucking, even if I don't ever intend to see them again. Of course, I want this *after* I've ejaculated in them; too much talk before hand actually often makes me less inclined to fuck them. But after, when I'm feeling very fine, I want some kind of connection, some kind of real intimacy to think about. We talked for about a half an hour about his situation and his background, both of which surprised me a bit but which I won't go into much here for his own privacy. He clearly wanted to talk about that and his plans for the future and his worries and everything, and his face was so different opening up like this, enthusiastic and open. And I really enjoyed his candor, surprised as I was by it's sudden efflorescence.

Of course it would have been better if we had this conversation while my ejaculate was still inside his body somewhere… I'm still a dog.

But it was nice.


  1. I think I'm wired the same way. Maybe it's just me trying to add some complexity to some really base/basic ritualistic instincts, trying to add some color and life to a body that I'm poking about here and there. Or maybe an attempt at some sort of intimacy to elevate an encounter, even though at the same time my prodding questions also seem kinda frivolous and trivial.

    1. Well, someone who wants to be open with you can quickly turn your frivolous, trivial questions into real conversation… that's how connections happen. I am just surprised it took this long with Ultra Meat. I've definitely opened up to him in the past, but up till how, he's kept it no-nonsense. I hope my stupid animal brain doesn't turn a personal interest in him around into a lack of sexual interest in him… but I know that's how I can be sometimes.