web log analysis Confessions of a Promiscuous Top: Necessity

Tuesday, April 10, 2012


Today I did what I had to-- I fooled around with a little Hispanic dude who I've already fucked. After the sudden cockblocking experience last night, I was left full of desire and all the pent-up cum that Mr Lanky Beauty churned up in my nuts while he was sucking my dick and being beautiful and making me desperately want to unload in him. I didn't do anything to take care of it, not wanting to waste the load on a sock or a tissue. I wanted to wait to give it to someone who really wanted it today. I admit I am sort of pining away for Lanky Beauty, as he is the one who got away. So I was looking for someone almost like him. But I have a lot to do today and would never be able to concentrate with balls as blue as Krishna's; today was not the day to pine endlessly for Prince Cocksucker. So when the little Hispanic dude appeared, I decided to go for a sure thing and hit him up.
Little Hispanic Dude had pretty much been after me ever since I moved to NYC. Most of his pictures don't really look like much, though one of them looked kinda sorta cute. I would always talk to him because I love fucking little, slight guys with big butts who shamelessly chase my dick, but I would never be very committal. He kept after me anyway. One day last summer I was having lunch at a Mexican restaurant in Manhattan with a friend, when who should appear as the waiter but Little Hispanic Dude, looking very natty in some rather stylin' (and tight) clothes and big clunky hipster glasses. I recognized him and he recognized me, but we made as much display of this as Japanese courtesans in a Noh play, and pretended like we were just two strangers talking about huitlacoche tacos. As if I had not been waving my boner in his face in photos online for the previous year. But this is when I decided I wanted to fuck him after all, watching him prance around with those buttocks in those natty clothes. He is more boyish than manly, so not totally my type, but that little body and meaty ass just HAD to have my dick in it. He came over one day and we kissed rather sensually and he sucked my dick and I fucked the hell out of him. Though as I recall he is one of the few bottoms who said he had to stop because he was getting sore.

Today I just needed him to get me off. He didn't have much time before work so I drove over to get there as fast as I could. On the way I saw tons of handsome hipsters with long meaty bodies and beards or scruffy chins and I was thinking, I really, really want that, I don't want to fuck today, I don't want Little Hispanic Dude. And I felt bad about these thoughts. But I was in serious need. I had a lot of other things to think about and I couldn't do that with all this semen backing up into my brain.

His apartment was in a niceish corner of a crappyish neighborhood, and the vestibule and stairway smelled very Hipster North Brooklyn-- a combination of body odor and what I can only imagine is some kind of vegan lentil dish that hipsters subsist on. The stairs were realllly dirty so I was like oh God what am I doing. But his apartment was very cute, clean, bright, comfy, so I relaxed. He was kind of all done up and coiffed, I guess for work. We went to his bedroom and he pretty much attacked my groin, so there wasn't much prelude. He whipped my dick out right away and sat on the floor between my legs and sucked it till it was thick and meaty. I stripped and hopped up on his bed and he sucked away at me.

I am a funny fellow. When I'm just getting my dick sucked, I actually like a big, meaty guy, the bigger the better, because for me it is fundamentally visual to get a blowjob-- I like to see the shapes of a muscular manly anatomy spread out in front of me, and a handsome, strong-featured face with eyes closed in bliss and a mouth full of my big fat tool. But when I'm fucking, I like them fairly little-- I just like to give a small guy a whole body fuck. I often feel ridiculous fucking bigger guys. Little Hispanic Dude is like 5'6. His little body looked really cute on the bed; he was still fully clothed in a t-shirt and some slacks that showed off his round butt very nicely. So my primal preferences shifted, and I began to want to fuck him, even though I knew my nuts were way too full and I would probably pop as soon as I stuck it in him. But I told him to take off his clothes and I flipped him on his back, pulled him by his legs until his groin was within grinding range, pushed his legs aside with my knees, planted my dick on his (which is bigger than mine; an impressive sight on a 5'6 guy), and humped him silly. He was moaning and thrashing and stroking my hairy back all up and down, with his feet on my calf muscles and his face pressed hard against my beard. I held the back of his head with one had and circled the other arm under the small of his back to press him to me as tight as I could, in what most bottoms really respond to as a fundamental gesture of ownership of their bodies. There is definitely something animalistic in pounding against someone else's body with your entire weight, with your arm wrapped around their waist like Hades does in the Rape of Persephone statue.

I circled one finger around his asshole and felt the slit there, but he really seemed too tight. I didn't think I was going to fuck him after all, so I lofted myself on my arms and fucked his mouth, with one thigh draped all the way down his body so he felt some of my weight with each thrust. He jerked and jerked and made whimpering noises. I got back on him and humped him some more, so close and intense, until finally my poor overburdened testicles simply had to let go. I sat back and seriously glazed him with long thick jets of frustrated ejaculate. He exclaimed and looked at the goo spreading all over him and kept saying "So much cum, so much cum, so much cum," and my dick kept firing, maybe 8 shots. I had seriously needed some relief. He came too and we rested a bit.

I offered to drive him to the subway and he took the offer after he spent some time getting ready. We talked in the car about Mexico, where he's from and where I've visited a few times. He moved to NYC completely on his own, with no friends or contacts, and has made it for a couple of years doing this and that, which I think is pretty impressive. He's a stylish guy and cuts a figure even though he's little. He was more friendly and open in the car than he has been before, which I like-- guys who are too businesslike about sex, even if that's all I want from them and really don't even catch their names-- just depress me. So this was a nice ending.

Then I went for a quick lunch and in my mind I mouth-fucked every big, hot guy I saw on the street. Something deep in me has still not cum... something still wants exactly what it needed. But sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do, and I did it.

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